The Christensens are now accepting applications for the following positions:
Nanny: The ideal applicant should have excellent children skills. Should have expertise in peanut butter sandwich making and transforming Optimus Prime into a truck and back to an autobot, and vice versa. Ability to read many many stories, most of which are picture books, so the story line would have to be made up, and the patience to watch the Disneyland Sing A Long over and over and over again are a must. Job responsibilties include playing with two adorably cute children while their mother sleeps. The children are ages 4 and 2, and do fight a lot, but if referee skills are present, this will not be a problem. Relatives of the children are REALLY encouraged to apply. Please submit your application as a comment to this blog or via telephone. If you qualify for the job, you probably know how to reach us.
Housekeeper:Basic housekeeping skills area must. The house really isn't THAT bad. The applicant should have excellent laundry, dish doing, vacuuming, and toilet scrubbing skills. The residents of the house include two children ages 4 and 2, who do not like to put their toys away. They have been instructed to leave them in the toy room, but that does not always happen. So another responsibility of the employee would be to organize the toy room, maybe also devise a solution to make it easier for clean up in the future. Relatives of the cute children are encouraged to apply. If you quality and would like to apply, submit your application through commenting on this blog or you know how to reach us.
These are both very satisfying employment opportunities. Compensation will be given in the best hugs and kisses you can get. The rewards are virtually endless with these positions. They are expected to fill very quickly, so your prompt response will be appreciated to be considered for these positions.
1 week ago
5 comments:
I thought I would leave a comment to scare the others into the competition of applying. Unfortunately I am already employed as a housekeeper and nanny. I am afraid that I will soon be fired from these positions as I do not meet the expectations of those around me (especially the children) and am not very great at either. Though I do have a good toy put away idea (though children I care for do not like to put away, either) but organizing the toys into plastic bin/boxes with lids and putting them up on a shelf in the closet. Only allowing one or two of those down at a time and demanding the other toys be put away before bringing down another box brings a tiny bit more sanity to life.
I would love to apply, and would definitely qualify for both positions, however it seems when we leave home, Papa or I or both of us, spend almost 50% of our time in your local hospital. Thus it's likely I'd be an unproductive nanny or housekeeper. But I could definitely use the hugs and kisses and would take them every opportunity that opened to me.
I am a C.N.A at a Children’s Hospital and I am a volunteer at Orangewood Children’s Home. I would love to apply for the jobs if they are still opened ma’am! I have a clean background check also!
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